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Jumat, 21 Juli 2017

Working Like a Man or How American Feminism Failed Part 1


The majority of the information for this post was pulled from a chapter of my master’s thesis Social Capital and the New Motherhood(2007). I tried to condense what is a complex argument, but felt I couldn’t make my larger point if I cut anything else. So, I have broken this argument up into two posts. In addition, look forward to further future individual exploration of many of the topics introduced here.

Images of American motherhood have changed drastically over the last five decades.   From the extremes of the Donna Reed image of the 1950s, to the career mother images of the 1980s, to the present images of the dedicated, self-sacrificing mothers (see the recent “Are You Mom Enough” article in Time Magazine), the way women have approached motherhood over these decades has been characterized by its place in the larger context of the women’s movement.

Early feminism, such as the nineteenth-century feminists like Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Lucretia Mott and Susan B. Anthony held motherhood in high esteem and felt that it was a noble pursuit specifically suited for women. Even the unmarried, childless Anthony was known for elevating parenthood to an almost sacred level. It is significant to acknowledge that the early suffragists belonged to the middle-class almost exclusively, which at the time had the benefit of an extended domestic staff. As such, their focus on equal rights seemed rational and legitimate because from their experience motherhood represented a marginal time commitment and little physical labor. They did not see motherhood as a burden or a legitimate focus around which a women’s movement could be organized in order to alleviate those burdens.

The early women’s movements were in many ways swept under the rug by the success of the women’s suffrage movement. Because of a depleted male labor force in World War II, women were pulled out of their homes to help in wartime factories and other employment opportunities. After the war, however, an ideological campaign to send women back to the homes began. The 1950s was dominated by the traditional male breadwinner/homemaker model.  As a rule, middle class women cared for the home and the children full-time while men worked. This “traditional model” was largely made possible by the economic reality of the family wage. A middle class man could make enough money on his income to not only own a home but also many new, modern time-saving devices such as vacuum cleaners, dishwashers, washing machines, and second cars. It was a time of economic boom and prosperity. The American dream was alive and well with a “can do” image permeating every aspect of life. (As a side note, the loss of the family wage is partially responsible for the current need to maintain a two-income family which places increased economic pressure on parents of young children who require child care, more so than families with school aged children)

It was during this time in the 1950s however, that many home-bound women began to develop their own economic independence. The memory of wartime women in the workforce was fresh and their re-invigorated participation was motivated by both a desire to afford more consumer goods and as a way of providing some economic independence from their husbands. In almost all cases the addition of even a small income was enough to elevate a family enough economically to secure a middle-class status. These incomes came from crafts and hobbies, Tupperware parties and sometimes part-time jobs.

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Senin, 03 April 2017

dear blog you may be second best but you could rise up a notch or two


{UPDATE Friday morning: It's back!! My IG is back! Got an email this morning apologizing for the inconvenience. I will keep this post up anyway, even though my rant is old news at this point}

Well, this has been an interesting night.

While giving Cecelia a bath, I decided to check Instagram. I fully admit to having an obsession with IG and would love to say that I never focus on my phone when I'm with my kids, but let's get real here. I do check my phone and IG frequently because I really enjoy connecting/sharing/documenting life via this stupid little app.

Yes, stupid. IG is stupid to me right now. If we are friends on FB you know why I say this.

So anyway, I'm checking IG and it returns me to the log in page, which I think I've seen about once ever. Hmm, weird. But I plugged away my user name and guessed on my password. Got it wrong. Tried again. Got it right but also got a red alert saying, 'Your account has been disabled due to terms of service violations.'

WHAT?

Okay, don't panic. Play with the cute baby in the tub. Must be a mistake, maybe I got locked out because I tried the wrong password.

Then I get a text from my mom asking if I removed my pictures from IG because she couldn't see any.

Oh, crap.

That is when my heart rate sped up a bit and I just knew this wasn't good. After getting CC out of the tub I looked up the actual terms of service of IG. Noted the 'no nudity' policy and wondered if my beloved naked baby butts were to blame for this. But seriously? Those images were pretty old and incredibly harmless and HELLO---they are baby butts, people. And adorable, if you ask me, but whatever.

So anyway, I keep flipping through the IG site and there is no phone number to call. There's some mumbo jumbo on the site about 'disabled account' and how you are basically at their mercy and pretty much screwed, 'unable to restore your account' if they deem it unacceptable. I google and see other people complaining about this in the past and how emailing them doesn't even matter because IG doesn't return their emails.

Sweet.

Again, try not to freak out. Text a few friends on IG to inform them of the non-freak out I am having (ha). Move through stages of grief including: shock, panic, sadness, and then anger. Oh, I was (am) so angry because how dare IG decide to delete my pictures! Sure, I probably have most of my original iPhone images backed up on Flickr and maybe even my computer, but I love the ease of IG and looking back through my account makes me smile. ESPECIALLY when I'm feeling as emotional and sentimental as right now, when my baby girl is about to turn one. Flipping back through her newborn pictures, or even a few of my pregnancy pictures brings me joy. I love our IG photo album I made for 2012---there is no way I can do that for 2013 now.  So sue me for 'needing' IG so much. I am also annoyed with myself for even caring this much. Because, really? It's just a stupid app and maybe it's a sign to chill out on the social media and the phone and be more present.

I posted on FB about this (ironic since I'm angry at social media and all it entails, and now I'm blogging and FB'ing) and apparently this happened to a lot of people tonight. Especially to shops on IG, but also to regular old users like myself. So perhaps it's a fluke and they got hacked; maybe we will get our accounts back. But I can assure you that I'm way too stubborn/angry/annoyed to create a new account right now and try to hunt down my IG friends again. Um, no. Maybe in time...but not now.

Moral of the story: something really weird is happening to my first choice of social media. And it's made me deep and reflective tonight. Also, it made me angry enough to vacuum and do an extra load of laundry I wasn't going to do. And it made me blog just to say, 'I have OTHER sources of connecting to my internet friends, thankyouverymuchIG.' Perhaps this will force me to blog more and not rely on the simplicity of IG as much.

Don't they know I have a first birthday party to post about? The nerve.

If you are my friend on IG now you know why all of my images are gone. And now I shall resume my birthday party projects and pretend like this doesn't bother me at all.

Come on, IG. Get it together. And if not, expect me a lot more over here ;)

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Kamis, 30 Maret 2017

Potty train a boy sitting or standing


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Senin, 13 Maret 2017

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Kamis, 02 Februari 2017

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